What makes people think that THIS coming year will be any better than the last?
Is it all conditioning, a marketing ploy to get us to go out and buy the latest thing to "help lose weight", "get more organized", or "get out of debt" because the holidays have pretty much maxed out the populous?
Whatever it is, people do it, every year, without fail and without serious thought. What is it that makes that one particular day special? We don't pay taxes that day. School doesn't let out that day. Life doesn't just magically reset that day, either.
Honestly, I don't care about the reason. For me, rarely has the New Year been a beautiful time of rejuvenation and starting over. In fact, most years it has been a depressing show of what I don't have, what I will never have, a time to wallow in the misery that was the year before.
And resolutions? Right. What are those about? Hey, I resolve to do this, this, and that. Poof. It magically happens, right? Nope. And because year after year, most people fail at their resolutions, I started calling them desolutions. Pretty much, right from the start, people set themselves up for the same misery the following year. I've seen it already, on Facebook, in life, pretty much everywhere I go. "I'm going to do such and such this year", "This year will be better. Last year sucked." Really? And why did it suck? How is it going to be better? Is Baby New Year going to wave a magic wand and send cupid to your doorstep for Valentine's Day, or a million dollar check to your mailbox on your birthday? Or send the liposuction fairy to your bed while you dream so you can wake up with those six pack abs, or runway model legs?
To be frank, the answer is no. No. No. No. No. No.
So, I don't make resolutions. I don't just claim the New Year as a fresh start.
How many of you out there have a five year plan? I don't. I have an idea of where I want to be, but up until now, I just went through the motions. Mind you, I made goals, but they were all short term. And there is nothing wrong with short term goals. They are like those rungs on a ladder that get you to where you want to be.
But this year, this year is different for me. I planned last year, made goals, found a team mate and lover and friend all rolled into one that gives me hope that I can make it to that place I want to be in five years. I haven't changed for him, but with his help.
And so, this year, I'm not making desolutions or resolutions or a fresh start. Because I did that mid year this past year. I didn't need a set day. Pshaw on the New Year Fresh Start ideal. Any time is a good time for a new beginning.
What I am doing this year is setting goals for this year. Why at New Years? Because that gives me a reference point. New Years shouldn't be about looking back with regrets, or merely hoping for better in the future. It should be a jumping off point for renewed goals and a redefining of plans, if anything.
So this year, my goals are:
- Keep my 4.0 (Or at least try my hardest to do so. I won't be too angry if I don't so long as I try.
- Help my kids adapt better to living in KS. They've done pretty good so far, but have had a hard time making friends because we haven't invited any over. So, I want to give them birthday parties, even if they are at a park somewhere, and help them have a life outside of just school and home, something I never really had.
- Write AND sub more stories. Be supportive of the hunny in his efforts to motivate me, and be less of a discouragement to him just because I get discouraged. I'm sure I wasted many of his valuable writing hours because I was being a whiny baby about things that were just excuses as to why "I can't right now."
That's it. I'm not going to overload myself with a bazillion little things. I'm going to strive to do what I need to in little ways to make this happen. One major thing and two supporting goals are quite enough to get me through the year. And when I finish schooling, I'll set new goals. I'll make new decisions. But no matter what, I won't look back with regrets.
And if something should change mid year... well...I'll jump that hurdle when I get there.
1 comments:
All good points. In fact, I'd say making goals mid-year goes to show just how serious you were. Waiting until the end of the year to officially set goals just shows how unmotivated a person is. And, after all, anyone who puts off goals until New Years can just as easily put them off again until the following year.
BTW, you are doing so well. I'm going to try to be as supportive as possible in all your goals, no matter when you set them. =)
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